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Jess's Favorite Fanfic Quotes

I need to start a post that is simply my favorite lines from fanfic.


Holland." He stood, holding his hand across the desk to his mentor. "I thought you were still in New York, dealing with that little matter for the Giovanellis." A little matter of their undead godfather getting busted -- again -- for tax evasion. Some things just never changed.

Holland returned the handshake, and added a paternal smile that creased his well-worn face and made him look like someone's grandfather. "It's all taken care of; Don Giovanelli will shortly be, ah, resting in peace once more. Hello, Lilah."
- from "Forgiven Chapter 5: Nobody's Buisness" -

Harry Pottter

Ginny snorts again. “Snape is more outdoorsy than she is,” she corrects, referring to the university's resident slightly mad Science professor who practically lives in the lab. His course profile states that he ‘does not expect students to comprehend the beauty of the softly simmering beaker with its shimmering fumes’. Ginny thinks he is a freak. Hermione loves him.

 - from "
Off the Beaten Track" by whirl_gig

“I’ll lay out some clothes and fix breakfast.” Bill took a vial out of a pocket. “Drink this,” he said.

“W–what is it?” George’s teeth were chattering.

“Hair of the Dog. It’ll sober you up.”

George pulled the stopper from the vial and chugged down vile-tasting glop. “Sadist.” He threw the cork at his brother’s head.

- from "For Bitter or for Worse" Chapter 1 by Kerichi

"Tasted like sour cherries," she said, wrinkling her nose. "Why aren't there contraceptive potions for men to take?"

George shrugged. "Society expects men to have self control. Unfortunately, willpower as a contraceptive is ninety-nine point nine percent ineffective."

- from "For Bitter or for Worse" Chapter 2 by Kerichi

He looked at her seriously. “We’re going to have a secret relationship for two years filled with hot, steamy sex everywhere from Snape’s desk to underneath the Hufflepuff table. We’ll plan to elope, but before we do, you’ll find out that you’re pregnant and we’ll get into a fight. We’ll get back together after a month and you’ll have miscarried. It will bring us closer together than ever. We’ll come out to our parents; yours will understand, mine will disown me, but I’ll have a fortune hidden away. We’ll get married, and live happily ever after with a Quidditch team of children, all devilishly handsome and breathtakingly beautiful. They’ll also be named after people we know. There’ll be Harriet, Draco, Molly, Narcissa, James, Arthur and Severus.”

- from Good GOD! Zabini by Underlined Twice
"Do you know that some animals eat their young to protect them?" Lucius stared out at the vast expanse of his lawn. "I think your mother was simply trying to protect you." 

 - from Buttercup Chapter 5 by Memories Fade

Most fifteen year-olds got a new racing broom for their birthdays, Draco had gotten his own stock portfolio, with shares in various magical corporations (plus one muggle company called Microsoft who paid extremely large dividends and whose business practices Lucius thoroughly approved of) and an annotated copy of Ars Maledictio, the ancient Dark Arts manual.

 - from Not All Scars are Visible. Chapter 5 by Elspeth1

"Wonderful," Snape muttered under his breath. "My life depends upon Sybil Trelawney's ability to keep a secret. I may as well perform avada kedavra on myself now."

 - from Not All Scars are Visible. Chapter 8 by Elspeth1 



Finally, he looked up, “I believe that true love,” he said, taking a deep breath, “is the willingness of two souls to sacrifice enough of themselves to complete each other.”
- from The Shot heard Round the World Part III by laurelnola